Courtesy of the author
- My wife left her tight-knit Texas family to move 9,000 miles to Australia for me in 2014.We've found creative ways to maintain family bonds across hemispheres.It's hard for her as an only child, but we make it work.
In January 2014, during a business trip to Texas, I met Cecilia at a music video shoot.
Within 24 hours, I convinced her to fly to Australia to meet my children. After almost a year of long-distance dating, she packed up her life and moved Down Under with me.
Becoming an instant stepmother wasn't in her plans
Moving hemispheres is challenging enough, but Cecilia also stepped into a ready-made family. She was the first person I'd introduced to my 8-year-old twins since my divorce five years earlier.
Courtesy of the author
Cecilia never pictured herself as a parent, but bonded with them instantly. They were thrilled to gain a stepmom and cultural ambassador who introduced them to Tex-Mex food, US sports, and the San Antonio Spurs, their new NBA team.
As an only child, the distance from her family hasn't been easy
Though initially upset, her parents have been very supportive. We established a four-person group chat that remains my most active digital space. We message daily, sharing everything from morning coffee photos to major milestones.
To ease homesickness, we committed to annual monthlong Christmas trips to Texas. We've developed many traditions during these visits. We keep clothes and personal items at her parents' house in San Antonio, eliminating the need to pack everything for each trip. Cecilia's parents even built a small guesthouse in their backyard, giving us our own space during visits.
Courtesy of the author
Not long after Cecilia moved, she was asked to be a bridesmaid for two of her closest friends. Unfortunately, with the weddings scheduled three months apart, we could only afford to attend one of them. This meant she had to make a difficult decision. Similar difficult decisions followed with missed birthdays, baby showers, and other significant events.
Fortunately, some friends from Texas have visited Australia. Most meaningful was when one of Cecilia's college friends from LSU met an Australian and relocated nearby, giving her a connection to home.
In 2023, Cecilia's mother finally made her first trip to visit us. We're still working on convincing her father to make the journey, using the lure of Australian golf courses as bait.
We've built hybrid holidays
Maintaining cultural traditions has been essential for Cecilia's well-being. We've established an annual "Friendsgiving" celebration in Australia, introducing our local friends to this American tradition. Cecilia prepares traditional dishes like her mother's jalapeño cornbread, bringing a taste of Texas to Australia.
These hybrid celebrations serve multiple purposes. They help Cecilia feel connected to her roots and create new traditions that blend our cultural backgrounds. Our Aussie friends now look forward to Thanksgiving almost as much as Christmas.
Technology bridges the 9,000-mile gap
When Cecilia's cousin's 11-year-old son got his first phone, one of his first actions was texting us. We now have a three-person NBA group chat, much to Cecilia's amusement and occasional annoyance. Since I don't have nephews or nieces of my own, I've embraced her extended family as my own.
Courtesy of the author
When my sons took up golf a year ago, they found a mentor in Cecilia's father, an avid golfer. During our Christmas visit, they played every other day, and he bought them equipment. The golfing relationship didn't end when we returned to Australia. I FaceTime him from the driving range so he can watch their swings and offer tips, and he tracks their scores via an app.
I've learned to make every trip count
Now I've learned that spontaneity matters as much as planning. Last October, when Cecilia turned 40, I surprised her with a ticket home to celebrate with her family. These last-minute trips cost a fortune, but are worth every dollar.
Cecilia gave up proximity to her loved ones to be with me, and I've learned that a sacrifice like that deserves daily recognition, not just grand gestures. Eleven years after Cecilia left everything familiar, we've learned that love can span hemispheres, thanks to creativity, technology, and a commitment to making the distance work. We can't shrink the 9,000-mile distance, but we've gotten good at making it feel smaller.
